Breaking Point
by EverlastingOblivion
Summary: Ale and Arlene had always been best friends. Then one day she just... dissapeared. [Axel's POV. Rated for Adult Content. Oneshot, concidering doing multichapter though]


_  
Breaking Point_

XxX

I gazed into her eyes and smiled. "Hey Arlene?" I asked softly, a bit nervous. It's not like I was shy or anything, but just being around her made me giddy.

"Yeah Ale?" she said smiling back at me.

I turned my gaze skyward, looking over the stars, and muttered, " What do you want to be…when you grow up?" I know it seemed like an odd question, but it only now occurred to me that our adolescent years were quickly coming to an end. We were both seventeen at the time; I'd be eighteen next month. And then a few weeks after that we'd be graduating. Arlene was my best friend, she always had been, but lately I wondered if their would every be anything more to it.

Growing up in Radiant Garden their weren't many choices of careers. Now that I'd have to find a job soon I was beginning to panic about what I was doing. I thought about asking Arlene, because she's a lot smarter than I am, but then she'd think I was stupid, so I cleverly formed my distress in the way of asking her a question. See, I'm not as stupid as I look. 

"I don't know. We're running out of time I know…but still. When your little you think you know what you want to be. And then you get older, your interests change. You don't want to be a doctor or a maid or a grocery store clerk. You want to do something else. Then you're always changing your mind till it's too late and you have to decide. So everyone else goes out and gets a job and you get stuck doing what no one else wanted to do. I guess what I'm saying is….I don't know…" she said, glaring at the grass. 

"Wow, Arlene doesn't know something? The world is about to be cast into absolute peril" I joked. She punched me in the shoulder, the way I knew she would, just like always.

"Shut up" she snapped and rolled her eyes at me. "Seriously Ale…what are we going to do with ourselves?" She walked over to the ledge and sat down, letting her legs hang down over the dangerous drop. I sat down right behind her and put my hands on her shoulders. She leaned back and looked up at me, upside down from her angle. 

I smiled my trademark lop-sided grin and said " dose it really matter what we end up doing? As long as we're still friends, that's all I need" I said truthfully. She smiled back at me and laid back, resting her head against my chest. I slid my arms around her waist and hugged her gently. "I love you Arlene" I confessed in a whisper. I couldn't believe I had actually said it! It had just slipped out! I acted as if I had meant to say it though and smiled. What really knocked me for a loop was when she looked up at me and said…

"I love you too"

I felt my heart pounding in my chest. Did she just say what I think she said? She giggled and nuzzled against my chest then she whispered "I was wondering how much longer it would take, for both of us to spill it." She grinned, a shallow imitation of the same way I did, and laughed. I laughed too. Soon we finally were able to contain our giddy laughter and an awkward silence fell over both of us.

Slowly I found myself nuzzling her neck gently, trying to find something to say. Not being the brightest bulb in the box, I found nothing to say. She had rendered me completely speechless. So I decided to do something else with my mouth that was probably a lot more enjoyable than listening to me babble.

I kissed her on the neck softly and I felt her tense up and then relax slightly, still a little rigid. At first I took this as a sign to stop but then she looked up at me hopefully and I kissed her again. Finally I let go of her and I swung around, sitting on her lap. I smiled viciously and kissed her right on the lips. For a second there was nothing, but then I felt her retuning my affection eagerly. I don't know how long we sat there, making out under the stars. I just remembered it was the most awesome feeling…

…the next day, she moved away…

I was crushed.

XxX

It would take me months to get over losing Arlene. I dropped out of school even I was so depressed. We had been friends since before we could remember. We had done everything together. She'd been almost like a sister to me, until that night up on the ledge and that magical moment we shared. To hear that she had gone away, it broke my heart.

I was unable to think straight, all I could do was think about her, and how she'd vanished just like that. She hadn't told me. Hadn't told anyone apparently. She didn't come to school the next day though, or the rest of that week even. Finally I had asked the principal if she was out sick when he told me her family had moved. I had wondered if she had known and purposely not told me, or if she had no idea and her parents had just sprung it on her. I even found a way to blame myself for it for a while.

I became so depressed I wouldn't even go anywhere that made me think about her. I'd slink off to the crummier side of town and sit in an alley way for hours on end, doing nothing. That was the only I could do to keep myself sane. If I thought about her anymore I'd drive myself over the edged. I had asked everywhere if anyone had know where her family had moved. No one had known. It was like they had just vanished…

Finally, one day came when I was down in they alley I had come to call my home away from home. The day I lost my heart. I had been completely devoured by my sorrow; I didn't even realize that that sorrow was gradually turning into rage and anger down in my heart. One day they appeared, the heartless. They had come for my heart. I didn't even put up a fight, that's how out of it I was. I remember them swarming, ten or twenty of them. Remember them attacking me, digging their nasty little claws into my chest, ripping out my heart, and then falling into unconsciousness.

Then I woke up feeling the best I had in forever. I didn't miss Arlene any more. There was one major con though; I didn't feel anything at all. At first I was frightened, unsure what this odd sensation was. I felt completely without feeling. Then a strange hooded figure appeared in front of me. It was a man with light blue hair and crazy yellow eyes. He had a painful looking X across his face. He held out a hand to me and said…

"Welcome to the family" 

XxX  
Three Years later…  
XxX

I had followed that blue haired man through some weird portal he called a 'corridor of darkness'. He introduced himself as Saïx and told me about my new family, Organization XIII. I joined them without much question, completely abandoning my old life, what was left of it, without a word. I had even changed my name, not drastically, I kept the old letters but just switched them around and added an X. That way I held on to my old life in a way, and was being reborn in another. Now the Organization was my family. They wanted to help me get my heart back. Even though I was unable to miss her anymore I had asked, at the slim chance that they had ever seen Arlene. They hadn't but they had offered to help me find her as well. I didn't miss her anymore, didn't love her any more, but I still wanted to know what had happened to her.

Time passed, a lot of time, and while I still remembered her I was gradually learning to forget her. All of our memories. All of our happiness and sorrow. Now none of it meant anything, so there was no point in remembering, I'd never see her again. I became completely focused on my missions, to collect the heartless and the nobodies of people with strong hearts to help the Organization. They would use these hearts to build their own Kingdom Hearts, and then we could all get our hearts back. I didn't know what I'd do when I did get it back, but I sure as hell didn't want to stay like this.

I had turned twenty one the day before, and one of the Organization's senior members, a man named Xigbar, had introduced me to my new favorite pass time…drinking. I had spent all last night drinking and I had the worst hangover ever. So today when Xemnas, the superior, had approached me with a mission I almost turned it down. The scary old man just grinned at me and said ' call it a birthday mission Axel'.

I reluctantly accepted this 'birthday mission' Xemnas had given me, instructing me to go to Travers Town. He said I'd know what to do when I got there.

XxX

I had used the corridors of darkness to warp me to this world, the world they called Travers Town. A light, friendly but cold rain began to pour as soon as I got there. It was oddly peaceful though. Maybe fixing that was what I was supposed to do. I looked around, still unsure of what to do. I was walking by an alley when I herd a muffled cry. I looked in to see something cowering next to a dumpster crying. Being the curious being I was, I walked over to it. It was a person. 

"are you okay?" I asked, setting a hand on the figures shoulder. They jumped and then looked up at me. It was a girl. I stared at her for a long hard moment. She seemed familiar.

She was covered in dirt and only God knows what else. She reeked of beer, cigarettes, and other assorted drugs. She was tiny and frail looking. She was also covered in scars and bruises. Even though I couldn't feel, I wanted to help. The poor creature looked like she had had the tar smacked out of her a few times. She was soaked from the rain and shivering. She was going to die if she was left out here.

"go away, leave me alone" she squeaked weakly. It was after I herd her voice I realized I had seen her before. I had seen her nearly every day of my life up until three years ago.

"Arlene?" I said, unable to believe it. She looked alert and then stood up shakily.

"No, go away" she said, her voice a bit stronger this time. I could tell by the look in her eyes all that fear I had seen a second ago turned to anger.

"Arlene…what has the world done to you?" I said softly. It was painful to see her like this. I might not have a heart, but it hurt me to look at her. I felt so sorry for her. I moved towards her and she backed away. "Arlene, please don't you remember?" I asked. I hoped she did, because she looked about ready to kill me. Someone had hurt her bad, I could tell.

"How am I supposed to remember every creep who's ever laid a hand on me. I wish you would all just go away and rot in Hell." I looked at her, confused. What did that mean? I had a feeling I didn't want to know. Before I realize what was going on I felt a sharp pain in the side of my head and I fell down on my knees. 

It took me a second to recover. I took another step towards her and she tried to hit me again. This time I caught her wrist and pinned it against the wall. She tried the other hand and I caught it and pinned it too. " Listen Arlene…" I started, but she cut me off.

She stopped struggling and went limp. She started crying again and yelled " fine, you can have me, but please at least have the decency to knock me out or something. I don't want to remember what happens." Then I finally understood what she was going on about.

"Oh my God, Arlene. What happened to you? It's me, Ale" I said shakily. Dear god she was a wreck. I let her go and she just stared at me blankly, unable to process what had happened I guessed.

"Ale?" she finally asked. I nodded, offering her a lop-sided grin. Her eyes widen and then she threw her arms around me and began sobbing desperately into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and ran my fingers through her hair. Still cut short like she had had it last time I'd saw her.

"what happened to you Arlene?" I asked softly, holding her gently. She was trembling against me as she cried hopelessly. "Never mind, lets get you out of the rain before anything else" I said. I took off the standard issue coats all the Organization members wore and put it on her. Several sizes too big, but it was better than her dirty and torn clothes. I would be fine in just my shirt and jeans, which I wore under the coat. I slowly lead her out of the alley, she still clinging to me for dear life. 

"You're not just some figment of my imagination come to torture me are you?" she sniveled.

"Course not" I said. I looked around for somewhere to crash and try to warm her up. I looked at her, her tiny frame trembling like a Chihuahua. "why would you think that?"

"I don't know" she sniffed and clung to me even harder. "I just want you to be real." 

After wondering around like an idiot for about ten minutes I happened upon an abandoned house that had been boarded up, perfect. I kicked the door down and led her inside. She sat down in a corner, shivering severely. "Don't worry, I'm real" I assured her. I picked the door up and pried a few of the boards off it. I set it back up as best as I could to keep the rain out then set the boards down in the middle of the floor. I kneeled down next to them and then summoned the powers I had gotten when I joined Organization XIII. The power to start fires.

Even though they were wet, with my pyrokinesis the boards bust into flames. I motioned for Arlene to come sit by the fire and warm up. She looked at me, almost seeming frightened. "I'll explain later, but now I have to know, what happened to you Arlene. You just…disappeared one day without a trace."

She looked at me and sniffed a few times before nodding. She scooted closer to the fire and then started:

"I'm sorry I disappeared Ale…but…it's a really complicated story. You see when I got home that night I found my parents dead. Murdered. And the killers. Well they were killers/kidnapers. They kidnapped me and took off with me. One of them called the school as my 'uncle' and told them that we had moved. That wasn't true at all though." He voice kept cracking and catching. I could only imagine what they did to her. I put an arm around her, remaining quiet. She looked at me, tears streaming down her face. " You have no idea what they did to me for two and a half long years. They abused me and raped me and…and" she broke down crying, burying her face in my chest.

I hugged her gently and said " I'm so sorry Arlene. If I would have known…" what would I have done? Rushed off to rescue her? Maybe.

"S'not your fault Ale, you got nothing to be sorry about" she choked out. I patted her on the back gently. I didn't say anything and after a while she continued." Finally I managed to get away from them one day. I stole one of their Gummi ships. I had no idea how to fly it so I just raced away as fast as I could and I crash-landed here, about half a year ago. I've been doing whatever I can to stay alive. Sometimes some guys though, they know a girl who's spirit is broken, and they'll take advantage of that."

I winced and hugged her again, harder. "I'm so sorry. I wish I had found you sooner. I would have given anything to know you were all right Arlene. I almost put myself in an insane asylum worrying about you." it was the honest to God truth.

A fraction of a percent of a decimal of a smile showed up on her face and she chuckled weakly. She leaned against me and before I knew it she was asleep.

I had ruined my life from worrying over, just to learn she'd been raped and beaten for the past three years. I felt awful for her, and sorry for myself. I had lost my heart worrying about her instead of doing anything. There might have been something I could have done, but I didn't. I let her sleep as I wondered to myself what to do about her. I had found the woman I loved, but I was incapable of loving her. That was beyond cruel. It was then I finally realized that God hated me.

XxX

She woke up, a few hours later. She looked at me and muttered, " You're still here."

"Course I am" I said. " Why wouldn't I be? I've only been looking for you for the past three years."

"I know, its just. I've been hallucinating, thinking I've seen you before and it turned out to just be a figment of my imagination. I was so worried you wouldn't be real and that I'd still be alone. Dear God I missed you Ale" she said, and hugged me again.

"I missed you too" I almost said _with all my heart_ but then I remembered I didn't have one. Hear that? That's God laughing at me. He's looking at Jesus and going ' you see the look on that guys face? Priceless! Where's my camera?'.

"…Ale" she said softly.

"Yeah?"

"ummm about that fire thing. How did you do that?" she asked, looking at me, seeming a bit intimidated. I'm sure Barney would intimidate her after all she'd been through though.

So I started "It's a long and complicated story. After you disappeared I kinda had a mental breakdown. My life just fell into ruin around me…" I still hated thinking back to then. I hated thinking about what I had let happen to me. I was so weak…so helpless. And I hated it.

"I'm sorry Ale" Arlene said, nuzzling against my chest. "You know…even after all this time….I still love you" she muttered softly. Great. That was only going to make the next part harder.

"I'm sorry to hear that…you see…I don't love anymore. I don't love anything. I don't hate anything either. I don't…feel…anything…at all" I said. She looked at me, sadness in her eyes. I touched my chest, feeling that empty spot where my heart had been. " I don't have a heart."

She just stared at me apathetically, as if she didn't believe me. Then she noticed the seriousness on my face and sadness filled her eyes. "Why" was all she could say.

I didn't want to tell her it was her fault. Mainly so she wouldn't feel bad. But also because it wasn't; it had been my weakness for her. "I…I was careless…my heart was stolen by these monsters…they call them heartless… and then I lost all emotions. I'm trying to get them back, I have been for the past three years. And until I do, I'm sorry, but I can't love you back. Not really anyway."

She was crushed, I could tell. She held me tighter and said "oh Ale…I'm so sorry."

"Ya know, I don't go by that anymore," I said. "See after I lost my heart I joined this organization of other people like me, without hearts. I changed my name…so I could forget. They call me Axel now. And well, this organization, they found me, and we are all trying to get our hearts back. When I joined the Organization I got these powers" I said. I held out my hand a small flame appeared in the palm. " Pyrokinesis."

She stared at the dancing flame with awe. Then she looked at me and said "are you going to go back to them…Axel?"

I nodded " I have to. I'll never get my heart back if I don't. But when I get my heart back I'll come back to you. and then we can be together again."

"No" she said coolly. She stood up and I stared up at her, confused. "No…you're not going away again" she said. Their was a definiteness in her voice, she wasn't going to have it any other way.

"Arlene I have to. I can't stay like this" I tried to reason. I would have to go back no matter what, but it would crush me all over again to know that she wouldn't want me too. I wanted her to want my heart back too.

"I know you do. But I don't want to be alone again. I want to come with you." I stared at her, shocked. She was kidding right? She looked totally serious.

"Arlene no-" I began but then she cut me off.

"I'm not a little kid Ale…Axel. I can make my own decisions." She grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet. "I'm going to come back with you. and if that means I have to give up my heart I will. Don't say anything till I'm done" she snapped, catching me before I could object. " You said it yourself, you can't feel anymore, so you can't love me. Why should I have to live with that torture? And when you get your heart back I'll get one too. Then we can be together and you won't have to leave me." She smiled and then said; "now I'm done."

But I was speechless. I smiled and said, " You're just as smart as you were back then."

She giggled and then hugged me. She kissed me gently on the cheek and said, " Silly, I'll always be smarter than you." She looked at me, a readiness in her eyes and then she said "I am coming with you."

"You know I could never say no to you, you witch," I said and she gave me a light punch in the shoulder. I sighed, thinking her logic was reasonable. I stared at her and then sighed. " hold on baby, this is going to hurt." I held her hand tightly with one hand as I placed another against her chest. Slowly I let the darkness go through the flesh and she began gripping my hand tightly, letting a soft pained cry escape her lips. I felt my hand sink in and I felt her heart, beating at an increased rate. I grabbed it and she screamed as I tore it out. I winced and then let it go, watching it float away, then be snatched up by a heartless.

I watched her to see if it would work. She had collapsed on the floor, holding my hand in a death like vise. My fingertips began to prickle from circulation being cut off. I herd her whimper softly a few times before she blacked out at let go. Now all I had to do was wait. Wait and see what happened.

XxX

A while later she awoke again. Her first reaction was to look up to me. Then she muttered softly "…I don't feel anything…" slowly understanding crept over her. Understanding of what I had been through. She frowned, but of course she didn't feel bad about what happened to me, not sincerely anyway, she couldn't.

"too late to turn back" I said darkly.

"I know. I still wouldn't have it any other way. We're together, and that's all that matters. As long as we're still friends, that's all I need, wasn't it you that said that?"

I looked at her, surprised and then laughed. After all these years…

"hey…Axel?"

"yeah?"

"What did you want to be when you grew up?"

"A fireman, ironic huh?" I said, and then burst out laughing. And within a few minutes she was too.

XxX

End


End file.
